From little acorns...

Here are a few photos of kids that grew up to be famous. Some are easy to guess, others a bit trickier.



























OK?
Marilyn Monroe, Marilyn Manson, the Queen;
Bjork, Gandhi, Einstein;
Hitler, Eminem, Elvis.

Space photos

I've not put on many images for a while, so here's me making up for it. The Hubble Space Telescope took these photos. Yes, they are photos. Yes, they're real. If you’re insistent on finding out the secrets to magic tricks, rest assured that the first image merely depicts a gaseous column of hydrogen, carbon monoxide and ammonia; the second is the Orion nebula. Science can dullify anything. Click on them and marvel.

Bad elephant

Mary the Elephant was a kindly, law-abiding elephant - a performer in the Spark's Circus at the turn of the 20th Century. Unfortunately in 1916 her keeper, a Mr Red Eldridge, poked Mary behind the ear while she was trying to eat watermelon. Understandably Mary became enraged, threw him against a drink stand and stomped on his head. The locals were horrified and other nearby towns vowed never to allow the circus in if Mary the Killer Elephant was around. At this point Charlie Sparks, circus owner, realised that he had to take drastic action. What do you do with a bad elephant? Hang it of course. In front of a crowd of bloodthirsty townsfolk, Mary was chained by her neck to an industrial crane and lifted off the ground. The first attempt failed when the chain snapped, breaking her hip and annoying her. The second attempt worked, and after a few minutes Mary had met her maker. She was buried nearby and became the first and possibly the last elephant to be lynched.

And in a brief round-up of other bad elephant history... in 1826 Chunee was executed in London with 152 musket rounds and a sword, and in 1903 Topsy (pictured) was electrocuted by none other than Thomas Eddison himself. The video's on Youtube.

Hmm. Surprising the number of ways you can execute an elephant.

"Mounted Ape from Hell"

I love this picture. The thought of a monkey riding a dog slaughtering 14 people changes the way I see the world. Especially a monkey called Terrence. I want to know - who gave him the sword and hat? Surely they are to blame for this butchery.

Curse of the Giants

Let's talk about giants. Acromegaly is a serious hormonal condition that causes excessive growth of bone. One particular sufferer was called Maurice Tillet. Tillet was a good-looking, highly intelligent Frenchman who aspired to write poetry and act on stage. Fate chose differently and symptoms of acromegaly began to become more apparent throughout his twenties, as his hands and feet continued to grow. Eventually his face also expanded and suffering ridicule in France, he escaped for a life in the U.S, desperate to find a vocation more tolerant. His break came when he was asked to become a wrestler under the nickname 'The French Angel' (also known less flatteringly as the 'Freak Ogre of the Ring'). His success was widespread and well-documented and he even won the American Wrestling Association World Championship in 1944. However, his professional success belied his personal problems and his bizarre appearance turned him ever more reclusive. Eventually, deprived of the medical assistance that could have saved him, he died from heart problems caused by his condition. Actors Richard Kiel (Jaws in James Bond films) and Ted Cassidy (Lurch in 'The Addams Family') also suffer from acromegaly, though improvements in treatment have made their condition more manageable. More recently Maurice Tillet received more posthumous attention - why? Someone spotted a certain similarity between Tillet and Shrek. Make up your own minds.

Immortal Shoe-Shiner

In 1826 Frenchman Nicéphore Niépce created the first ever photo in a process that took 10 hours of exposure. By 1838 his partner, Louis Daguerre had formulated a quicker, more practical process and took the first ever photo of a human being shown here.


The photo depicts Boulevard du Temple in central Paris on a busy afternoon. Unfortunately the process still took several minutes of exposure, so the bustling Parisians and horse-drawn carriages are invisible. The only exception happens to be a man having his shoes polished by a street shoe-shiner – obviously the only ones to remain reasonably still throughout. So, the first photo of a person was not of a monarch, photographer or model, but rather an anonymous, oblivious shoe-shiner and his customer. I find it strangely reassuring.

Scalping

Somewhere on the plains of western Kansas in the summer of 1864, a wagon train was carrying supplies to Fort Union, New Mexico. As they stopped for an evening meal, they were attacked by a group from the Brule Sioux Indians allegedly led by Chief Little Turtle himself. The soldiers charged with protecting the wagon train had been held up and consequently the wagon teamsters were entirely unprepared for such an attack. Every member of the caravan was brutalized and executed in various grisly ways. When a government scouting party found them, they discovered that Robert McGee, a 13 year old driver, had miraculously survived. He was whisked off to an infirmary where he gradually recovered and became one of the few people in history to have survived being scalped.

32 years later, in an effort to gain a pension, McGee waxed lyrical about the event to the Marshall County Democrat. He claimed that Chief Little Turtle “in a transport of fiendishness” had “knocked (him) to the ground by one blow of his tomahawk… took (his) own pistol and shot him…”, fired two arrows into his back and “others of the band in passing, cut him with their knives and poked holes in him”.
And then he was scalped. He even claimed that he later returned to fight against the Brule Sioux and in a strange coincidence bumped into Little Turtle dead on the battlefield and shot him dead.

Anyway, the point is the guy survived having his scalp cut off, grew a spectacular beard in recompense, and consequently looked like this.


Note: One of the other members of the exclusive “I’ve been Scalped” club, Josiah P. Wilbarger (scalped 1833), said it felt like hearing distant thunder.
Think about that.